Christmas Shouldn’t Start Until the Turkey Leaves My System
A Festive Editorial
November 30, 2016
As a born and raised Montanan, I know that winter has the possibility to start all the way back in September. In Helena we had our first glimpses of snow mid-October. With these early winters it is easy to get into the Christmas spirit four months in advance which is the only problem I have with the holiday.
Now there are plenty of people that could be titled scrooges; these people hate the holiday season or just people in general during this type of year. Now before I go on my rant about the holiday season, I must stress that I love the upcoming season and am not a scrooge. I do have a problem though when the man in red starts to invade the world around me before I have had the opportunity to indulge my face with Halloween treats.
The biggest problem for me is when I try to go buy last minute school supplies or Halloween decor and I have to walk through a forest of plastic Christmas trees. Or when I hear people around me start to hum Christmas tunes like “It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas,” and “Let it Snow.” It’s at these precise moments that the strength of my willpower and moral integrity are tested. I have to fight the urge to stop from pushing down the trees in a domino effect fashion or from throat punching the person behind me in line.
Once again I must stress the fact that I love the holiday season. I enjoy the snow, hot chocolate, lights and parades. I just really don’t get why we have to enjoy it four months in advance. One of the things that is special about Christmas is the rarity of the season. When we start the Christmas celebrations so soon, it just ruins the specialness of it. It’s like when Steve at work has everything in brackets for the two months following March Madness because he doesn’t want it to end.
I personally blame large companies for my October blues. They are so busy commercializing the holidays and stuffing tinsel down our throat that they don’t give us enough time to process fall festivities. Their presence is so well known that a new holiday was created to rake in more money. Black Friday starts the second Thanksgiving ends, and with the marvels of the internet age you can start shopping on turkey day itself. Black Friday completely devalues the whole establishment of Thanksgiving. We go from the stressful, awkward family meal that by the end of the night shows us how thankful we are for one and another only for Steve to leave before the pumpkin pie is brought out so he can get in line at Walmart. Even though he can get better deals on Cyber Monday which is another corporate created holiday.
As an individual myself I will be taking a stand this holiday season. I hereby decree that I will not partake in the usual Christmas festivities until December first. I hope that you the audience will follow in my suite this holiday season.